"Building a Man"

I was in my "zone" cleaning away and had a nice pace going. Brian comes up to me, his brother in tow (with ba-ba) and asks if he can "help." I stopped and looked at him and then to the squirt bottle of cleaner in my hand. The first thing that runs through my mind is "He just wants to play with the bottle of cleaner. If I let him 'help', Tyson will want to 'help' and this is going to take forever!"

I'm consciencly trying to not have that thought run through my head anymore. A few years ago I was reading this book about a fictional family set in the Revolutionary War period. The series of books, 'Prelude to Glory' were O.K. I did, however, really like the characters he created.... where is this leading to?...

There is a point when the mother is admiring a brick wall or some such that her husband and son had constructed together. When her husband typically asked to share in her thoughts she complimented the job well done. He grunted that it was but took about 3 times as long to do because he had to do it with his young son who she had insisted to let help. She looked at him and said "well, you weren't building a wall, you were building a man."

I really pondered that over and have thought about that a lot. It really struck a chord with me that yes, it is a lot of the time easier to do it myself but that is not the point. The point is that I am here to teach my children to be responsible adults who can care for themselves and be a contributing, helpful influence on society.

This is not so easy to do in todays society. I feel a lot of adults have forgotten the fact that teaching their children a good honest days work and a job well done is important to the building of character. I have had friends admit to me that they know they should probably have their kids do chores but it's too hard to make them do it and besides they can do it faster.

So when my kids say "well, my friends don't have to do chores. You just want me to be your slave! (which I admittedly told my own mother)." I just tell them, "no, I love you and want you to learn to be of value and have self worth!

But yes, sometimes it is hard not to discourage innocent provering of "help" when a part of me admittedly considers it a hinderance. So I was proud of myself when I barely skipped a beat and handed over the bottle of cleaner and started directing the proper use while employing Tyson to a task he would be happy with (wipe-up boy).

Surprisingly enough , they worked well together and actually cleaned the lower surfaces pretty well! It also provided a content atmosphere of working together for about a whole 45 minutes!

Thank you my little men!